Day 1 Winner of Quarto’s 2022 Thunderdome Flash Fiction Contest. View the prompt here.

Did you know that when whales fuck there is often a third whale—a true bro, the ultimate wingman—who props up his dearest friend until he shudders sweetly into his darling whale lover, which takes about thirty to sixty hot hot seconds. This usually happens in the afternoon.

It breaks my heart, but this is a lie. How many good stories are just lies? Did you know only the male blue whales sing and the females pick the deepest song. Because deeper might mean bigger, juicier. That's how they got so big, the whales. I don’t make the rules.

Did you know that for 12 years a blue whale in the North Pacific called for a mate but got no response because he was singing in the wrong pitch? 52 hertz, silly goose. Was that a lie? No, was it. Please, I’m begging you.